There’s more to be said on this topic, truly, but I’m glad I am not alone.

The Midwestgrrl: Brrrrrrriinnngggggg!

Czeltic Girl: Sing it, Sister.

It’s similar to the mentality of whoever interrupted my restroom break just now. Our building has about three toilets available (one for each floor) for men’s use. Naturally, around lunch time, or the time just after, they see quite a rush.

As I sat, taking care of business, the door breezed open. Someone entered who likely had just found a different stall occupied. This happens frequently. The door opens and closes and disappointed men wait their turn elsewhere. This fellow, however, ruined the peace of the moment with an exasperated “Damn it!” followed by a long sigh. Then, for a few moments, stood in the restroom, as though I were even *able* to simply stop what I was doing to allow him to have a turn. Is his bowel health more important than mine?

Anyway, unrelated as it may seem, this is the still same thing that “phone people” don’t seem to understand. The person is imposing on your schedule and thus implying that theirs is more important. If you email me, I will likely respond within a few moments, and happily so. You are requesting a response in my own time, rather than in yours, even moreso than leaving a voicemail. If you have a question needs answering, just email. Fire and forget. If you call instead, I must put my life on hold to run and answer the call, which may end up taking anywhere from thirty seconds to several hours, depending if the caller wants to “catch up.”

Then, when I do pick up, if I have no excuse to not talk (say, I’m simply playing video games or watching Family Guy) I may be trapped on the phone by simple politeness.It’s difficult for anyone to say to a friend, “No, I haven’t got anything pressing really, but I’d rather not be on the phone with you just now. It’s nothing personal.”

When I call people, it is usually a last resort, because they have not answered the emails I have sent or because there is an urgency behind the communication which might not be properly catered to over email. I understand the imposition and try to get the business out of the way quickly. Additionally, phones are particularly ineffective for organizing multiple people for an event. Email can handle this REALLY easily.

Grr. Anyway, read the articles above. They handled this in a much funnier way. I’m just a grouchy old bugger.

Matthew Baldwin, seer of seers, shows us the text adventure that should have clued us in, from the days of Zork.

defective yeti: Xyzzy

How long does it take to (add your own job here)?

For me the blank is usually filled with “…build a website (or piece thereof)”. And the answer is always, of course, “It depends.” Because anyone who works with computers knows that it certainly does.

With what words would you fill in the blanks, oh readers?

A restaurant for the rest of us, as told by the legendary Tim McKee.

NINJA New York

MHG’s brother, DJ Johnny Arson, identifies with this site. And he should, as should anyone who is under-appreciated. Which is everyone. Except that guy over there. Fuck him.

Be sure to check out the delivery stories. They’re the funniest part. And it may be the only place in the world you’ll read : GONA-MONA-HERPE-SYPHIL-AIDS.

Please Remember To Tip The Pizza Delivery Driver

Czeltic Girl hipped me to Hanasiana. He writes good stuff, and is therefore worth reading. Look at me, I have not unlearned the ways of being verbose.

I also added For Myself and Strangers to the sidebar over there. Same praise applies.

People won’t shut up about this. Included in “people” is my own home-making instinct. Precedents have been set in my life to deter me from marriage. My mother’s been divorced twice, many of my aunts and uncles have been divorced. My grandparents are from a time when divorce was anathema, and so have endured. I’m not afraid of commitment, I’m just afraid of marriage.

Then again, many of my friends are happily (?) married. Gay people all over the country are fighting for the right to be legally recognized in marriage. My engaged friends think of it as a boon and often are thrilled in the discussion of it.

But, honestly, what is the draw? I have never understood it, possibly for the reasons above. Before I go any further, I should state that this is not a criticism of marriage, married people, engagement, or engaged people. You have your reasons, I’m certain, and I know it is something that makes you happy. But I, without sarcasm, cannot understand how it would make *my* life any different.

I am not one for personal spectacle. While I am happy to share in those moments with my friends, I am uncomfortable with events in general. I find that the stress leading up to such things can outweigh the event itself. And if that’s true, then why would I do that to myself? Also, I find that many events (not necessarily weddings, but sometimes) are actually non-events. Like Ayn Rand or Mr. Incredible might say they are simply celebrations of conformity or mediocrity or the simple ticking of the clock. I’m up for a New Year’s bash like anyone, but I’m not going to stress about making it memorable. Memories come on their own, and often shy away from force.

Events which are truly events have significance outside of their date and their planning. A play is just a play, but a play that is the culmination of months of hard work, of commitment, and of a burgeoning sense of confidence, and maybe of self-realization is an event. Perhaps this is what draws people to marriage, or more specifically, to weddings.

What commitment I have made to my girlfriend (for lack of a better term) is personal to me. It does not involve other people. I need no symbol of that bond, much like I need no photo to remember something that changed my life. The record is to share with other people, and I understand that, but I am selfish of my love. Also, I am fond of the storyteling tradition. Rather than show a record of something, I would prefer to tell the story so that the person can understand my emotional attachment to it. And my memory is typically like a Xerox copy, anyway. Ask anyone who knows me.

So, (assuming the spiritual connection is already present) without an event, without a symbol, what is a marriage? A legal merging of two people for the purposes of custody and financial representation? Fair enough. But if something should happen to split my girlfriend and me, I would likely be emotionally wrecked. Why would I want to deal with the added trouble of legal and financial woes? A secular government really has no place in marriage, apart from determining custody, and so while I believe gay people should have equal rights when it comes to marriage, I more believe that marriage should be illegal, or more accurately, alegal.

As for children, that seems to be the sticking point for me. Eventually, I would like to have children with my girlfriend. But will it be more difficult for us or for the children if we don’t have that legal documentation of our spousal status? I’m not certain. It seems to work for Mil. We have discussed what names our children would have (probably mine), but the concept of marriage only really seemed to be a good idea when we were talking about insurance, particularly since she is currently in school and not working full-time. We were almost ready to head to the courthouse that afternoon and just get the damned paper.

I’ve been thinking about it for some time, as should be obvious, but I’ve yet to come to a conclusion. Even following her divorce, my girlfriend still sometimes thinks about having a nice wedding (her first was a disaster, to hear her tell it). Is my rationalization denying her something that would make her happy? Or is it better that I not pursue something so counter to my beliefs, even if my motive is to please her?

Regardless, it’s not likely to happen soon, if ever. Meanwhile, I will enjoy the open bars and dance floors my friends are providing.

So, there’s this guy. He works at my company and he’s well-liked by many people whom I have come to respect. I am baffled by this, but I cannot deny it. They believe him to be congenial, well-mannered, and — most astonishingly — competent.

I do not feel the same way. Allow me to elaborate. It will make me feel better.
(more…)

My friend and colleague, Tim McKee, is a finalist in this poster design contest for a wicked-cool series of games. Throw him a vote while you’re toolin’ around the web. This is your chance to use your powers for good.

Silent Hill Poster Contest: Voting and Judging

I’m way behind the times on this one. I know. I also understand that at this point, people have to be irritated with this thing (and thus never sent it to me.) But allow me to tell my story.

The high school stage combat troupe that I teach over the fall and winter got this dance tune rocking on the auditorium stage. Since I was chronicling this year’s troupe in documentary style, I decided to get footage of it.

The students were captivated by the pure joy of the tune. Combine that with my own feelings of euphoria over the way the show had gone and it made for child-like-in-their-purity memories, which is part of why I do the whole thing in the first place. Unfortunately, my adult decorum didn’t come down on the party as it should have, and the troupe was chastised for playing the song loudly over the auditorium speakers. Our group is known for its rigorous discipline, and I should have been more responsible and saved them (and me) from a tainted reputation, but such is life. Really, no harm done.

Still, this was my first exposure to the song. So to find the meme that no doubt started the whole nasty business brought lovely little giggles to my somewhat dampened spirit this week. Without further ado, I give you a small compilation of…

Numa Numa dance [Newgrounds embedded flash, opens in new resizing window, don’t panic, reload for multiple versions]
See also: The Llama Song. Or don’t. It’s entirely up to you.