I’ve noticed that the majority of the entires I’ve written recently have related in some way or another to comics. Strangely, though, I own less than twenty of the things.

I like many of the characters and the stories that these modern dramatists create, but I shun the collecting aspect of the hobby. I can remember almost all of the operatic sagas of my favorite characters even just hearing them from friends. And, not to cast aspersions on those talented illustrators and writers, my imagination tends to fill in the gaps of my need for heroism.

Which comics could I not live without? I’m glad you asked. These links were just hanging out with nothing to do and I told them they could be all hover pseudoelemented under this paragraph.

The Maxx, issues 1-4.
The Tick, issues 1-12.
The Sandman: Game of You.

After all, one can only resist so long. I officially became a MMORPG’er last night, having received my beta client for City of Heroes. Already I love it.

You get to survey the area from rooftops, leap down on criminals and save the innocent, all while the mega-powered fly overhead and deal with cosmic threats. The world is immersive and smoothly executed, so much so that you find yourself speaking “in character” a lot of the time.

“hey” becomes “greetings”, “dude, on the right” becomes “hostiles at 3 o’clock”, etc. At least for me. The wide variety of characters is almost astounding but then you see Silver Paladin, Nurse Notorious or Mighty Kid murmur “I o\/\/nz j00!” and you remember where you are. Still, fun.

Most-Honoured Girlfriend, luckily, is also interested in it. She is nervous that I’ll be so engrossed that she will only be able to communicate with me through her superheroine avatar in the game. At some point, she will have to come to grips with my double life in a three-part series where I must choose between her and rescuing 300 hostages from the terrorist controlled cineplex. In part two, we make love. I’m looking forward to that.

This may surprise you, but I like comics. And I like movies made about comic superheroes. It’s a guilty pleasure of mine, and an endearing quirk, kind of like that brilliant professor you had in college that you were so sure was above everything, but then you found out he was into posing My Little Ponies in scenes from Merchant Ivory films, and you respected him that much more.

So, when I see all the movies being adapted from comics using the impressive technology available, my heart lets out a little happy (but entirely hardcore and heterosexual) squeal. My favorite superhero, Spider-Man got the treatment recently to thunderous applause from me. Sam Raimi, Danny Elfman, Tobey Maguire – oh heaven, thy name is Sony Pictures’ executive in charge of greenlighting that movie. And now Hellboy? What else is there to say but “Fucking sweet!”

But, it’s hit or miss, isn’t it? The Hulk failed even with Jennifer Connolly and Ang Lee. Daredevil managed to have every character more interesting than the lead. Hell, I might even be interested in the (hopefully) ultra-violent Punisher movie, if they wouldn’t play the most horribly whiny, angst-instead-of-anger, lame-ass, white boy, power ballad during the trailer.

Yes, the Punisher is entirely broken down by the tragedy of losing his family, but that trailer should be hitting us with Samuel L. Jackson meets Led Zeppelin force, the kind of energy Brnadon Lee and The Cure somehow milked from that sad-turns-mad scene from The Crow. Pure wrath, no remorse.

Did anyone on that project read the comic books? Dude simply lives to murder wrong-doers now. He doesn’t get all weepy about it, he just destroys asses, like the dildo that bears his name. The PUNISHER.

Ah well. I get a face full of Hellboy this weekend, and that’s enough for me.